on a personal level it's murky, because i care for him and we have established a real bond with each other. i felt betrayed, but i worry that i am also betraying something larger, breaking some ethical code.
he makes me happy. shouldn't i be able to enjoy that? how can i if he's unaware- if, at any moment, he'll slip into a comfortable whiteness and choose not to challenge racism or white supremacy?
this is confusing and challenging and necessary. we must confront this stuff if we're going to make it work.
hmmm. like i said:
love is the only way to sustain any such effort. a commitment to love on a grand or minor scale. it will take a lot, but thankfully love is infinite- so, we'll see...
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